Fear. Such a primal emotion. Plays on our evolutionary triggers, to the extent that I'm not actually sure it's fully an emotion. More of a chemical reaction intended to protect us from predators that used to be higher up on the food chain. Honestly though, I think that's a bit of an oversimplification.
What is that feeling, when you're lying safe in your bed at night, doors locked, windows bolted, gun on your side table, and yet you can't help but feel that something is waiting for you, out in the darkness? Something that you can't stop? Why is it that we fear darkness? Not outdoor darkness, that's understandable; it's a survival instinct. But tame, indoor darkness, darkness that we choose to be in, to sleep in, to spend eight hours out of every 24 in. Why do we fear it? Is it the same evolutionary trigger that makes us fear the outdoor darkness? The fear that there's something out there, unseen, that could possibly eat us? Is it really that simple? Or is it something worse, something more ancient perhaps, from the mythological mists of time, before our written records, just an unspoken dread that all humans carry in their hearts? I'm not sure, and that in itself is a bit scary to me. Not being able to fully analyze myself is a strange phenomenon that I'm not entirely comfortable with.
I know that animals have fear built in on a low level. Perhaps, humans, at a higher state of evolution, or creation, or whatever, over think a basic instinct. Because when an animal fears something, it walks away, or attacks. When a human fears something, it thinks about it a good bit. It's the reason for the phenomenon in horror movies, when the oversexed teenager hears a strange noise from the area that the killer was just in, and decides to go check it out, when clearly the smart thing to do would be to get out as fast as you could.
While I'm on the subject, why is it that humans are the only species to willingly experience things that scare them, such as horror movies, scary TV shows, haunted houses? What is this obsession with experiencing fear? If one of my dogs sees something that scares them, they walk away from it. They don't try to stand there for the adrenaline rush. Why do we insist on sitting through these tortures to our instincts, when really all they do is condition us to numb our natural reflexes?
Perhaps it's the intensity of the adrenaline rush. Most rushes we have a measure of control over. Sex, fighting, speed. All with a measure of control, the ability to slow down. But fear, fear is another story entirely. We have a certain lack of control from fear. We can't just slow down or stop being afraid of something. So the rush deepens, to the extent that you hear your blood roaring in your ears, and the slightest movement of anything will cause you to attack or run, just like the basest of animals.
Fear is yet another driving force for humanity. Fear of darkness drove us into light. Fear of exposure forced us to build shelter. Fear of loneliness causes us to seek that special someone. Fear of pain and death drove us to discover medicines and medical treatments. Fear of stagnation, of never being anything, drives us to do great and wonderful things. But I believe the worst and most intense of all higher fears, is the fear of being forgotten. Of passing from this world and no one noticing or caring, or even if they do, they quit caring about it as soon as the funeral is over. That's part of the reason for the funeral home and gravestone industries. What is a gravestone, if not a big sign that screams out "Remember me? I existed!"? What is a funeral, if not some last desperate attempt by the deceased to make an impression? You see, even the poorest of people try to make sure they have arrangements made for a decent funeral.
All the men and women who have done great works of art, architecture, technology, engineering, all those who have left their mark on the world, have done so, so that they are not forgotten. They may not think so. They may give reasons, such as progress, altruism, even money. But what they truly want is to simply be remembered. That's why fame is such an attraction. Because if you get famous enough, you will always be remembered.
Fear, darkness, and madness... Whispered furtively in the night, in case they are listening.
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